Me as a Workaholic

You never know that 

how your pasts

can influence your present moment 

so greatly

until it happened randomly

and you just kinda freaked out

clueless about what to do

for the next few moments

your mind is stuck with the scenario

the past come upon like a tidal wave

strike without a sign

and leave without a trace

people always say

let bygones be bygones

but the "bygones"

is defined as things that happened in the past

and at the same time

you've let go it completely

people around me say that I'm a workaholic

in fact

I admit to myself that I am

even my doctor advice me not to overwork my brain

but through tonnes of works

I find myself really enjoy those moments of working

and the joy is irreplaceable

though this kind of attitude has been a viral factor 

of maintaining a relationship

yet after all this while

I like myself when I'm at work

I'm at my fullest when I'm indulging in madness

I couldn't express the joys when I'm super busy

though this busyness will leads me no-where

but at the end of the day

I rather work than feeling alone

I rather work than thinking of the past

that's me

a brand new self-defined "me"

I'm accepting for who I am

I'm embracing for who I want to be

 yup

that's what I wanna be

@.@